Fred and George's paintwork
by fire99
Summary: Fred and George think that Umbridge is getting her way a little too often, so they decide to do something about it. A story set during the twins last year at Hogwarts.
1. Chapter 1

**Fred and George's paintwork**

Umbridge was having the morning of her life; Fudge had just sent her a new decree that officially gave her more authority than all the other teachers, even Dumbledore. She thought that nobody could stop her now. She had a point, none of the teachers or anybody with any power could do anything about it, but she had forgotten about the Weasley twins.

While she was sitting in her office trying to decide which teacher she would sack next, Fred and George were just finishing their next big project: Weasley`s permanent paint; irremovable black paint that even a vanishing spell couldn't get rid of permanently, because it would always reappear one hour later. Their plan was to test it on in Umbridge's office. So, when everyone left for their first lesson, Fred and George went down to the first floor carrying to huge tubs Weasley's permanent paint. But, to their dismay, Filch was patrolling the corridor. They realised that he would probably be there all day, which kind of spoiled their plan. Just then, they heard a cackling voice saying:

"Why, why, it's the weasels, and there up to no good! Ooooooh, naughty, naughty! Tut, tut you'll get caughty." Fred and George knew immediately who it was.

"Peeves!" exclaimed Fred.

"Want to have some fun?" said George.

"Mmmmm, should call Filch you now, if you're messing around in the corridors…" said Peeves mockingly.

"We just want to give our dear High Inquisitor a little present to congratulate her on her latest educational decree" explained Fred in a saintly voice. "

"Oooh, is it going to be smelly, smoky, smashy or mouldy?" asked Peeves in a gleeful voice.

"We're not telling, are we George?" replied Fred

"No. Well, not unless you get rid of Filch for us" said George

"Ooooh, yees! Peevsie sure knows how to have fun with Filchy!" Excaimed Peeves as he drifted down the corridor.

A few seconds later, the twins heard a few suits of armour clang as they fell to the floor and a loud shout of "Peeves! Come here you bastard!" They couldn't help laughing as they saw Filch running after Peeves, while Peeves threw ink pellets and walking sticks at him as he chanted: "Wee, I'll bash your nosey, I'll smash your cat, and you won't catch me, 'cause you're too oldie for that!"

"You just wait 'till educational decree number 57 comes out Peeves! I'll have you thrown out once and for all" shouted Filch just before an ink pellet went up his nose.

When both of them were out of view, the twins turned to the door of Umbridge's office.

"Alohamora", whispered George, while he pointed his wand at the lock on Umbridge's door. With a soft click, the door swung open. The twins grinned at each other.

"Welcome to pinky world!" said George, slamming his tub of paint on Umbridge's desk.

"God that was heavy" said Fred.

"Yeah, we should have put a weightless spell on them." Said George.

"Definitely. Shall we get down to business? I think I'm going to be sick soon if we don't do something about all this pink." Said Fred

"Yeah. And we'd better hurry up. We only have about 20 minutes until the lesson finishes and I don't think Filch will chase Peeves around the school forever!" replied Fred.

"Right you are! Why don't we start with the walls?" suggested George.

"Brilliant! I really think this old room needs a change of decoration." said Fred with a mischievous grin.

First, they wrote: "_This is the high hypocrite of Hogwarts' office. Anyone aspiring to become a liar, a manipulative old hag or a greedy overgrown toad is welcome!" _on the door and then they painted moustaches on the cats in the pictures. Next they made funny drawings of Umbridge on the walls, and finally, they wrote more insulting sentences on the walls, on the carpet and on the ceiling.

"Much better." said George.

"Yeah, we could really give her a few tips on decoration" said Fred

George snorted. Just then, they heard the footsteps of everyone exiting their classrooms for break.

"Time to disappear" said Fred

They grabbed the empty paint cans and walked out of the office. George, relocked the door and they hurried down the corridor and out of sight, looking very pleased with themselves.

"That was so much fun! Can't wait till she sees it" said George.

"Neither can I." said Fred. "Why don't we wait till we see her reaction" he suggested.

"We can't. She'll suspect us immediately if we hang around" replied George.

"Not if we hide in this broom cupboard she won't, and we'll still have a perfect view of the show" explained Fred with a devilish grin.

George laughed and they both crammed themselves into the broom cupboard before anyone could see them. They made themselves comfortable, well as comfortable as you can get in a broom cupboard, and they waited for Umbridge to arrive.

**Please review!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: This is my first fanfic so please, please review! Thanks for reading this. Here is chapter two. :)**

The twins had just closed the door of the broom cupboard when they heard what sounded like a stampede of elephants going down the hall, but really it was just the rest of the students going down to lunch. It was sunny, which was a rare thing at Hogwarts, and it was Friday, so spirits were running high. Suddenly, over all the laughter, loud voices and footsteps, they heard a loud shriek. A huge silence spread through the corridor at once.

"WHAT IS THIS? WHO… WHO HAS DARED TO DO THIS… THIS RIDICULOUS… THIS RIDICULOUS… THING?" they heard Umbridge stammer.

Fred opened the door of the broom cupboard a little bit so that they could see what was going on. A circle of students had already began to crowd around the door of Umbridge's office and were craning their necks to see what was going on.

"OUT! Everyone out of this corridor immediately!" screamed Umbridge.

The crowd began to disperse, but not before mocking Umbridge and making her even more furious, if that was possible.

"Whoever did this is a genius" they heard a Ravenclaw gill say to her friend as she walked away.

"Did you see her face…" said a tiny Gryffindor to no one in particular.

Inside the broom cupboard Fred and George heard many remarks worshipping their work as the students left the corridor. They were delighted! The effect had been even better than they had imagined.

Soon there was hardly anyone left in the corridor and the twins finally managed to get a glimpse of Umbridge. Her hair messed up, and her face was as red as the rubies in the Gryffindor hourglass.

They heard voices and Fred opened the door a bit more to see what was going on.

Malfoy, Crabbe and Goyle had approached Umbridge confidently and were trying to reason with her.

Fred and George only managed to hear bits of what the conversation but it wasn't difficult to imagine what was going on.

"…but professor we can help you…" Malfoy was saying.

"Mr Malfoy do you think I cannot handle this on my one?"

"Of course not. But I just thought that maybe…"

"I do not need help from a little fifteen year old like yourself to clear this little, um, this little problem" exclaimed Umbridge getting even redder.

"Look I can just vanish it!" she said, giving Malfoy a patronising look.

Inside the broom cupboard the twins exchanged gleeful looks.

Umbridge waved her wand and the words on her door disappeared. She was just turning to Malfoy, Crabbe and Goyle with a smug look on her face when… BANG! The words had reappeared on the door in even bigger letters, and Umbridge's pink robes were now splattered with black ink. "Overgrown toad" was written clearly over her chest.

Umbridge was now shaking with fury and was muttering under her breath while she pulled her hair out. She looked as if she had gone completely mad.

Malfoy's confidence and desire to help the woman seemed to have disappeared completely, as he was now backing away from her as fast as he could. But in his hurry he tripped over Goyle's leg and the both fell to the floor bringing Crabbe down with them, who caused a few suits of armour to crash down on top of the three of them. Umbridge seemed impervious to their struggles and was still pulling her hair out in exasperation.

The whole situation was so ridiculous, that Fred couldn't help laughing out loud.

Unfortunately, Umbridge heard him. She immediately started running towards the broom cupboard while she ordered Malfoy, Crabbe and Goyle to follow her. The three boys disentangled themselves from each other, pushed the suits of armour of them and got up clumsily.

Umbridge reached the broom cupboard and put her hand on the doorknob but hesitated before opening the door, afraid of what she might find inside.

"Hurry up!" she shouted angrily to the three boys.

Her hesitation gave the twins the extra time the needed to formulate an escape plan.

With a wave of his wand Fred blasted the door open, just as George threw a handful of instant darkness powder in the air, leaving them all in the dark. The force Fred's spell had not only blown the door off its hinges, it had also knocked Umbridge into the opposite wall and left her unconscious.

"Agghhh. I can't see" they heard Goyle cry someway down the hallway.

"Shut up you moron" Malfoy hissed a little closer to where the twins were standing.

"God, I absolutely…" started Fred.

"…forgot about those three good-for-nothing nosey Slytherin pricks" finished George.

"Yeah."

"Stop, whoever you are. If you hurt me my father will hear about this" said Malfoy trying to sound confident.

"Ooooh I'm trembling" said George sarcastically.

"Lumos, lumos, lumos…" Malfoy muttered.

"Won't work" said Fred teasingly.

"Ha. I know who you are. You're the weasel twins" said Malfoy in a victorious voice.

"Wow, your deductive skills simply amaze me" said Fred in a mocking voice.

"Yeah, turns out he can actually think" George replied.

"Life is full of surprises my dear brother" exclaimed Fred.

"Stupify" Malfoy shouted, pointing his wand in the direction of Fred and George.

The spell missed the twins and bounced off the wall, hitting Crabbe who was groping his way towards them instead.

"Pathetic" said Fred.

"Even a rat would have better aim" added George.

"You know, I think he would make an excellent rat" said Fred.

"Let's see" replied George.

"Don't you…" Malfoy started to say, but the twins waved their wands and with a loud pop he turned into a rat.

The sight of him chasing after his own tail made Fred and George laugh till their eyes watered.

Still laughing they walked to the end of the corridor, stunning Goyle along the way. Malfoy the rat started to chase after them, but in the darkness he ran into a wall and disorientated himself completely.

Twenty minutes later the twins entered the great hall for lunch looking really pleased with themselves.

"I always said that boy was a bit ratty" said Fred as they sat down at the Gryffindor table.

"You know, I think a cockroach might have suited him better" said George.

"No, a rat definitely suits him better. But let's try a cockroach next time." replied Fred grinning at his brother.


End file.
